How To Heal From Betrayal With EFT Tapping?

How To Heal From Betrayal With EFT Tapping technique?

Healing From Betrayal With EFT Tapping Technique

Most of us have experienced betrayal at some point in our lives, ranging from minor inconveniences such as a friend cancelling on us or white lies to more serious breaches of trust like infidelity. Betrayal robs us of our sense of calm and happiness. Let's get started and learn what EFT Tapping technique is and how it can help you heal from betrayal.

Life is a long, rocky ride filled with troughs and crests of emotions and feelings. We meet people, form relationships with them, and they become a part of our lives.

Relationships aren't always simple, and they're rarely easy. Most people, however, enter a relationship, whether romantic, platonic, or otherwise, expecting to be able to trust the other person to meet certain needs.

In other cases, a person is not only expected to meet specific needs, but they are also meant to offer reliability.

So, what happens if your significant other fails to meet your needs, or even goes out of their way to reject them in a way that hurts you?

“If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you're allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.”

Shannon L. Alder

Loving relationships are bound together by emotional attachment.

When someone breaks their commitment to us, it can feel like a betrayal, leaving us feeling helpless and powerless. 

When our attachment bond is threatened, our brains produce strong emotional reactions. When we are betrayed, we can shift from thriving to surviving, believing that everything we hold dear is in jeopardy.

The good news is that, if both people choose to learn from the experience, betrayal can lead to personal progress. Because of fresh insights and wisdom, it is possible to heal from betrayal and establish a life that is even greater than before the betrayal happened.

Come on, let's find out what feelings betrayal evokes and how you may heal from it.

EFT Tapping technique to Heal from Betrayal


Betrayal is one of the most painful misfortunes a person or any organisation can suffer. An individual must first trust the betrayer before being deceived. If you didn't trust the person in the first place, you will not experience feelings of betrayal. 

Traitor or betrayer is a term used to describe someone who betrays others. As a result, the act of someone betraying your trust is referred to as betrayal. The term "betrayal" as used in this article refers to a multitude of different types of betrayal.

  • The act of exposing or delivering someone to an enemy as a result of betrayal or treason
  • The act of betraying someone's faith, hopes, or expectations
  • The act of disclosing confidential information
  •  Breaking or failing to keep a pledge, principle, or cherished memory
  • An unintentional act or instance of showing or displaying a quality or characteristic, usually one that is best kept hidden

For example, when a child is abused by the parents who are supposed to love, support, and protect him or her, the child is betrayed. When a spouse's partner has an affair, they are betrayed.


Being betrayed is one of life's most painful events. Betrayal is severe because it kills trust, and relationships cannot exist without trust. Society, families, institutions, and, most importantly, marriages cannot work without trust. Because it shatters a person's ability to trust, betrayal shakes them to their core.

What makes many people betray the trust and confidence that they have been given? There are a few possibilities (1).


Excessive greed, lust, or passion are the first. When an individual can't manage his vices, it outweighs any sense of loyalty or integrity he may have. A person's desire to live a lavish lifestyle may lead him to misuse confidential information. Overwhelming sexual attraction can sometimes lead to betrayal in a marriage.


The second reason could be that you believe betrayal is required to achieve a larger good.

In this case, betrayal is viewed as a holy act rather than an evil one. 

It's possible that a person believes it's okay to betray another person in order to save his or her life or soul.


The third explanation could be that people enjoy demonstrating their intelligence.

Many people enjoy playing with other people's thoughts and manipulating their lives in order to cause havoc.

The Golden Rule is well-known: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Those people, in the context of betrayal, DON'T CARE ABOUT OTHERS.

New to EFT? Learn how Emotional Freedom Technique Tapping heals.

Emotional Freedom Techniques (tapping) is clinically proven to lower stress, tension, anxiety, past trauma to enable health, happiness and vitality.


Many of us have been at the receiving end of betrayal. It can happen in a variety of ways and with a diverse group of people. However, it produces some level of suffering wherever it comes from and in whatever shape it takes.

There's a lot written about how to get over betrayal, but there's not much out there to assist you to work through the feelings and conflicts that come with it.

When we are betrayed, there are a few stages we go through. May it be of assistance to you if you've been betrayed, and may it also assist you in treating people better around you (2).

EFT Tapping technique to deny the Truth

we deny the truth:

Denial frequently manifests as avoidance or addictive behaviour. We may abuse drugs or alcohol, overeat, or gamble, or we may simply avoid the situation and erase the other person from our lives. These are just a handful of behaviours one may exhibit when denying that betrayal has occurred.

EFT Tapping technique when experiencing Loss

Experience of loss:

One of the most severe losses a person can suffer is through betrayal. We live in a culture that is intolerant of emotional pain and oblivious to betrayal. Loss can occur as a result of a variety of experiences and circumstances, and it can have a profound impact on us. The one who has been betrayed is in a state of mourning.

It hurts:

Betrayal stings like hell, whether the consequences are addressed through apologies or being ignored. We can heal, but we must do so at our own pace and on our own terms.

EFT Tapping technique when betrayal hurts

we breathe our rage:

We are filled with anger and it's important to figure out what's at the bottom of a problem. The irony of betrayal is that you can sometimes betray yourself after being deceived. Anger may appear to be a sign of strength, but it actually demonstrates how much you care.

EFT Tapping technique when we breathe our rage
EFT Tapping technique to break illusions

Lose our illusions:

Most of us go through life believing that this is how things should be, so when they don't conform to our expectations, we lose our bearings—even if they were illusory all along.

EFT Tapping technique to forgive, not Forget

Forgive but don't forget:

William Blake once stated that forgiving an enemy is easier than forgiving a friend. You can't turn off your feelings for someone after you find they've deceived you. It creates internal tension.

Trust is difficult to regain after it has been lost:

Not in a year, and probably not in a lifetime. It's difficult to regain trust once it's been broken.

EFT Tapping technique to regain trust

Everything will be different:

Old feelings and anguish are constantly nearby, ready to remind you that nothing will ever be the same again. As a result, you learn to deal with them, regulate them, and punish them.

Everything is Different
EFT Tapping technique to avoid doubts

we try to hold on to our doubts:

Doubt causes a lot of suffering and might even end a good relationship. There are few things more toxic than doubt, and if you've been misled, it feeds your tendency to doubt even more.

Betrayal causes Sadness

we Live in sadness:

Once betrayed, we carry the weight of that betrayal with us, often feeling sad. You may find yourself crying from time to time. Realise that it's normal to feel sad after a betrayal.

Break the chain:

You may feel like a victim at first, but you will soon realise that you have the power to break the cycle of negative behaviour. Make every effort to make peace with the person who has deceived you. If you are unable to speak with them, write them an email and send it to them. If you are unable to send it, write it anyhow and destroy it. It is tough, but vital, to break the chain.

EFT Tapping technique to break chains

Finally, accept your consequence:

It's the only way to move forward. By clinging on, you are endangering yourself. Only by acknowledging and accepting your injuries will you be able to endure them. Always remember that feelings are neither good nor harmful. What we do as a result of our emotions can be wrong or terrible, but we have a choice.

Accept Consequences


Individuals who have been betrayed by a loved one are known to exhibit symptoms comparable to those experienced during a traumatic event.

However, betrayal can cause a deep level of pain that can last for a long time, sometimes even years. If you've been the victim of betrayal, you may be baffled as to why the agony is so severe and difficult to bear.

Here are a few reasons why betrayal hurts so much to help you grasp the depths of your anguish and how it affects your life (3):

Betrayal is relational

The closer you are to someone, the more heartbreaking it feels when they betray you. For example, if an acquaintance lied to you instead of your partner, you would not feel the same amount of betrayal. When someone you care about and trust hurts you, it's tough not to generalise your feelings and fear that other people in your life will do the same. This belief is disconcerting, and it has the potential to affect your capacity to be open and vulnerable with others.

Our instincts are threatened by betrayal:

We are hard-wired to seek a sense of belonging and connection. We naturally feel that once we choose a spouse and emotionally bond with them, they will never hurt us. When we are betrayed, our judgment and intuition about that individual are questioned. It's frightening to have lost faith in your instincts.

Betrayal is a traumatic experience

No one expects to be betrayed. You're in a relationship because you trust that your partner will keep you safe and won't harm you. When betrayal strikes, these assumptions are destroyed in a second, prompting you to reconsider your perspectives about yourself, your world, and the people that inhabit it.

Betrayal is puzzling

When intimate betrayal isn't something you'd ever do and thus goes against your principles, it's difficult to understand how someone could do it. It's stressful to try to make sense of someone's betrayal, and it might lead you to assume it's your fault. Our minds crave an easy explanation, and the first one that comes to mind often leads us to blame (or doubt) ourselves, even when we are not to blame.

Betrayal has a personal feel to it

It's personal when you're betrayed. When it's about someone else, we make up any reason we can to avoid making it about them. This personal prejudice exists for a reason, despite the fact that it is irrational. When confronted with intense pain, our minds want to make sense of it as rapidly as possible in order to recover safely - the rationale being that if I can figure this out, I won't be as pained. We turn to the simplest option, which is that it must be something about myself, because we don't have a decent reason.

How To Self-Heal & Become An EFT Practitioner

Discover how EFT Tapping can help you to self-heal or to become professionally qualified as a Certified EFT Practitioner. Emotional Freedom Techniques (Tapping) is clinically proven to lower stress, tension, anxiety, past trauma to enable health, happiness and vitality.


Healing frequently entails first coming to terms with what has occurred.

If you don't deal with the betrayal, your problems may spread to other aspects of your life. So, let's take a look at a few methods of healing from betrayal.

The three C's of betrayal healing are (4):


Connect with your emotions

You are not going insane because betrayal triggers your survival response. It's natural to react with strong emotions, especially fury. You are enraged as a result of the following feelings: despair, disappointment, anxiety, shame, and blame.

It's also likely that the current betrayal has triggered memories of past betrayals. Observe and validate your sensations without judging to heal past and present betrayal. They will be able to flow and pass as a result of this. Allow yourself to feel lighter and freer as if you were a parent comforting a small kid.

It's critical to seek help in a safe place if your sentiments are particularly intense or overwhelming. Work with a knowledgeable, trusted friend or a counsellor—gentle, understanding persons who can help you make sense of your feelings and reclaim your sense of self.


Confront your feelings

Validate your feelings as previously explained. Don't hold on to your story for too long. Ask yourself, "Why did the betrayal happen in the first place?" and then make the necessary changes. It's crucial to know that if you decide to stay with your partner or buddy, they share your beliefs. The relationship is unlikely to work if you value honesty and trust and they don't.



Be compassionate towards yourself and for the one who has deceived you. Make a list of all the wonderful decisions you've made in the past, and a list of all the people you can trust when you ask yourself, "How did I get myself into this?" This creates a sense of equilibrium and perspective around the betrayal. Betrayal rarely occurs in all aspects of one's life.

Always keep in mind that life is a learning process. It takes time to heal and ongoing action on their part to demonstrate that they are open, honest, and trustworthy at all times before you can trust the person who misled you the first time.

The good news is that there are new and more effective ways to minimise the anguish caused by betrayal.

Emotional Freedom Techniques are one such powerful healing strategy (EFT Tapping). EFT has been shown in studies to reduce stress, anxiety, tension, sadness, physical tension, limiting beliefs, and barriers, as well as all other distressing and unpleasant sensations. It's so simple that you can perform it not only on yourself but also on others.

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT Tapping) is a mind-body practice that helps people boost their energy and happiness by identifying and addressing the root cause or repressed emotions.

If you would like to help others or make a difference in the lives around you, and experience the power of EFT Tapping first-hand, just download the EFT Tapping Booklet below.

New to EFT? Learn how Emotional Freedom Technique Tapping heals.

Emotional Freedom Techniques (tapping) is clinically proven to lower stress, tension, anxiety, past trauma to enable health, happiness and vitality.


Bring to mind someone who has wronged you and keep those feelings in mind as you tap along...

STEP 1: 

Take a brief temperature check on yourself to see how you're feeling. You're probably depressed and sad, and you have the option of discarding the concept of connecting. To begin, connect with your emotions, assess where you feel them in your body, and then tap on yourself using EFT.

“Even though I feel really betrayed, and it really hurts me, I deeply and completely love myself.”

And because betrayal is so painful, you may find yourself stuck in this phase for a long time. All those sensations and emotions that have been building up can be tapped into.

STEP 2: 

You could wish to express how you're feeling and assume that the individual is present while tapping along. You want to get it off your chest as soon as possible.

STEP 3: 

Ask yourself the following question to go deeper into the emotions and memories related to betrayal feelings: What memory comes to mind as you consider these feelings?

Work on a past memory of betrayal, which may lead to other betrayal memories. There will almost certainly be an early memory of betrayal from which a belief was developed, and that belief will be triggered.

Sometimes, when you primarily experience betrayal, and then you believe that people are always going to betray you, the sad thing is that betrayal will keep attracting betrayal in your life.

It’s only when you break that pattern, and say that you are done with it, that you realise what you’re going through and what you want

STEP 4: 

Now is the time to start thinking about how to move on from the betrayal, and to connect with your intuition, which will lead you in the right direction. Begin by making choices that will benefit you and keep you happy and fulfilled.

STEP 5: 

Take a gentle breath in, release it out, and have a sip of water.

STEP 6: 

Determine how strong the sensation of betrayal is. Once the feeling has diminished to a level that you're comfortable with, you can stop and finish with positive tapping. If you think it's the same or worse than before, dig deeper into the memories and emotions and try again.

Heal from Betrayal with EFT Tapping technique

I understand that moving on from betrayal is difficult. I, too, have experienced betrayal at various stages in life. EFT tapping, my peace technique, has always been there for me and has always helped me get through it.

It's natural to desire to be alone in the aftermath of betrayal. Small acts of compassion for others, on the other hand, will remind you of your true nature—the kind, loving being you are. Never allow a single act of betrayal to dim your brightness. Just because a few people betrayed us, we should not lose our confidence or ability to trust others.

Let us hope and pray that there will always be those who enable us to preserve our faith in humanity.


Dr Rangana Rupavi Choudhuri (PhD)

P.S. Want to discover if EFT Tapping is right for you? Book a Complimentary Discovery Call.

How To Self-Heal & Become An EFT Practitioner

Discover how EFT Tapping can help you to self-heal or to become professionally qualified as a Certified EFT Practitioner. Emotional Freedom Techniques (Tapping) is clinically proven to lower stress, tension, anxiety, past trauma to enable health, happiness and vitality.

In summary, EFT tapping might be of immense help to you if you have been betrayed. You will be able to break away from the grips of betrayal if you work through your ideas and feelings. EFT tapping is an excellent place to start when it comes to exploring your feelings. It will provide you with the tools to develop a different perspective of the betrayal and help you work through the stages of grief to determine what you want to do about it.

Disclaimer: The information on this website is purely for educational purposes and does not in any way replace the requirement for medical and psychological diagnosis and treatment. Please seek professional medical and psychological diagnosis and advice for all medical and mental health conditions. It is advised to always book any consultations with qualified professionals.

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