How To Surrender Resentment With EFT Tapping
Surrender Resentment With EFT Tapping
All of us have experienced feelings of resentment at some point in our lives. Resentment is not really driven by any particular mental disorder, but rather by an insufficient expression of emotions following a traumatic incident. The EFT Tapping technique is a method, which has been clinically proven to help people release any underlying negative emotions, can help you heal your feelings of resentment.
Do you remember experiencing a mixed feeling of guilt, anger and sadness, and not being able to name it?
Maybe when you were unfairly treated at work? Or you were not acknowledged and appreciated at an interview and it could not get you your dream job?
This feeling of guilt and sadness mixed with anger is resentment. All of us have experienced it at different times in our lives.
Resentment can run deeper than it sounds. The anger and guilt towards one's own self harm one's self-image and confidence tremendously.
Having being able to name that mixed feeling you felt once makes it easier to work on it. Here is a little more on what exactly this feeling of resentment is, how it affects a person and what one can do to get over it.
WHAT IS RESENTMENT?
Resentment is a complicated emotion that combines disappointment, disgust, anger, and fear. Others regard it as a mood or a secondary emotion that might be evoked in response to insult and/or injury.
An unpleasant emotional reaction to being mistreated is referred to as resentment. There is no single origin of resentment, but the majority of cases involve a sense of being wronged or mistreated by another person.
Resentments occur when people become enraged at a person, institution, or situation and refuse to let go of their feelings.
Frustration and disappointment are inevitable parts of life. When emotions become too overwhelming, they might lead to resentment. When this happens, trust and affection in relationships are lost, and the damage is sometimes irreversible.
A person who is resentful will typically experience a wide range of emotions, including anger, disappointment, bitterness, and negative sentiments.
The following are common causes of resentment:
- Relationships with individuals who insist on always being correct
- Someone else taking advantage of you
- Feeling humiliated
- Other people's unrealistic expectations
- Not being heard
- Encounters with people who are constantly late
- Feeling like you are the target of regular bias or discrimination
- Envy or jealousy
- Having accomplishments go unnoticed while others flourish without putting in the same amount of effort
- Feeling like a victim
- Not charging enough or declaring your worth
- Being dissatisfied with one's status or comparing oneself to others
SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF RESENTMENT
Resentment prevents you from letting go or accepting someone, at least momentarily. However, there are a few symptoms that you or someone you know may be on the verge of suffering excessive resentment.
Here are some of the warning signs and symptoms of resentment to be aware of (1):
Wave of negative feelings and emotions:
Recurrent negative feelings toward people or situations that have damaged you are common. These feelings could include; anger/frustration, hostility, feelings of sadness, bitterness and hostility.
Inability to put the event out of your mind:
Resentment can often rise to an inability to stop thinking about the event that created such strong feelings.
Negative ideas can take control and last for weeks, months, or even years.
Regret or remorse feelings:
Resentment can lead to sentiments of disappointment or remorse in certain people. When a person recalls a difficult experience, they may react to regret and remorse by blaming themselves and wishing they had acted differently at that moment.
Fear or repulsion:
Certain people or events may bring up uncomfortable recollections of wrongdoing when you are resentful. This may lead you to avoid situations or individuals who elicit negative emotions in you. This is frequently done to safeguard oneself and their own well-being.
A complex relationship:
Resentment might cause your connection to shift. Holding grudges and behaving out passive-aggressively are two ways some people deal with resentment. For others, resentment might lead to the breakup of partnerships in which wrongdoing occurred.
No will to solve problems:
You no longer feel the need to resolve issues going on in your life and surroundings.
Sense of invisibility or inadequacy:
When you interact with people or settings that remind you of prior abuse, you may feel invisible or inadequate. When this happens, past feelings of rage and hatred may resurface and become more powerful. If you have been injured by someone and see any of these signs, it could be an indication that you are developing resentment.
Anger is a difficult emotion to let go of:
Resentment might make it difficult to let go of anger in some cases. You might even feel compelled to seek vengeance. Maintaining such a high degree of negativity has a negative impact on your mental health. You often ramble about how annoying the other person is, but just not to their face.
Keeping track of all the negatives:
You never fail to notice any negative event or thing that occurs, and the good stuff flows away.
How To Self-Heal & Become An EFT Practitioner
Discover how EFT Tapping can help you to self-heal or to become professionally qualified as a Certified EFT Practitioner. Emotional Freedom Techniques (Tapping) is clinically proven to lower stress, tension, anxiety, past trauma to enable health, happiness and vitality.
RESENTMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS
Resentment is one of the biggest killers of relationships.
It is not uncommon for you to find build-up of resentment and disappointment in your relationships. It is something that is experienced by most people in relationships especially long-term.
Resent is a form of anger where you hold the following stuff in:
- Feelings of anger
- Feelings of shame
- Feelings of hurt
Thus, the anger you repress and the feelings you do not address keep bubbling beneath the surface and slowly turn into resentment.
Once resentment builds, you will start noticing that you are annoyed with the habits of your partner. You may not like your partner the way you used to.
In long-term relationships, resentment is the consequence of years of built-in pain, feelings of hurt and shame.
Relationships also come at an expense of expectations. As long as you believe that a relationship can fulfil you, you are going to feel lacking in your relationships.
THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN RESENTMENT AND MENTAL HEALTH
As resentment is such a prevalent emotion, most people will feel irritated or angry at some point in their lives as a result of unfair treatment. However, when a person is unwilling to forgive, difficulties might arise—persistent animosity could be the result of a significant issue.
For example, after years of mistreatment, a child may reasonably dislike a parent and grow unable to see past any injustice.
When a person learns to see themselves as the victim in every unfavourable scenario, however, they may acquire a distorted perception of reality and find it difficult to recognise any positive consequences.
There are times when these feelings are necessary and can be expressed in a healthy manner. It is natural to feel upset, frustrated, and annoyed. However, issues develop when you are unable to move on from these events.
To maintain a happy emotional state, you must learn to forgive and let go. Acknowledging the sentiments beneath the resentment and facing them one at a time is considered a significant component of overcoming resentment, as is developing the ability to move on or forgive.
For some, the resentment sensations are comparable to an exhilarating high that gives them a false sense of power. Sometimes, even though they feel "wonderful," they might develop feelings of resentment if left unchecked.
HOW TO LET GO OF RESENTMENT?
For most people, letting go of resentment entails forgiveness. Some people believe that making peace with a past event and moving on is more beneficial to them. Regardless of how one chooses to get rid of resentment, it will almost certainly require changing one's mindset or emotional responses.
Talk to your doctor if you are starting to feel like your resentment is getting out of hand. You may be referred to a psychologist or psychiatrist by them.
The best way to deal with resentment is to first figure out what is causing it and then figure out who you're dealing with. To be able to move on with your life, you must forgive and find a way to make peace with what happened.
Consider why forgiveness is so difficult
What emotions come to mind when you ponder letting go of resentment? When you first try to let go of resentment, you may experience a variety of feelings such as resistance, fear, and rage, especially if you have been holding resentment for a long period. Taking time to process these emotions can be beneficial.
Experiment with different ways of expressing anger and resentment
Share your feelings with people you trust who are safe and supportive. You can keep a journal or write about them. Work them out, go for a walk or run, go for a hike, or play a sport to release them. Participate in actions that promote social and economic justice, as well as other forms of peaceful activism, if it is acceptable for the situation (2).
Self-compassion is a powerful tool
Some people use resentment as a coping mechanism for uncomfortable or difficult feelings. While this may initially feel calming, it might be harmful in the long run. Compassion for oneself aids healing by allowing you to process your sorrow with attention and gentleness.
Empathy is a good option
You might find potential misconceptions by investigating why the scenario or person produced animosity. You might be able to minimise resentment by trying to see things from a different perspective.
Embrace gratitude
It is natural to become engrossed in the unpleasant events taking place around you. By concentrating on the positive aspects of your life, you can increase your happiness and positivity. It can be beneficial to reflect on the things and people for which you are grateful.
Look into therapy options
Those who have trouble forgiving others for any wrongdoing, no matter how minor, may benefit from counselling. Those who want to understand why they are resentful of a certain person or scenario may want to revisit the experience, either alone or with the help of a therapist. You can try a variety of therapies, but Emotional Freedom Techniques, often known as EFT Tapping, is my personal favourite (3).
A therapist will help you practice self-compassion to get rid of resentment. You can also try a variety of therapies with a therapist, but Emotional Freedom Techniques, often known as EFT Tapping, is my personal favourite to let go of resentment (3).
Resentment can become overwhelming and even toxic to the person who harbours it if it is not addressed. So consider all of your options and what you may do to let go of your resentment.
Life is a continuous process of learning. It takes time for you to recover from whatever you are going through and any terrible experiences you've had.
The good news is that there are new and more powerful approaches to resentment surrendering.
Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is one such effective therapeutic method, also known as EFT Tapping. It is popular among netizens as it is an easy-to-learn technique and flexible enough to be used by anyone.
It is a form of alternative therapy method involving intentional tapping gently with fingertips on acupuncture meridian endpoints while speaking out truthful statements.
Stress, worry, tension, sadness, physical tension, fears, restrictions, anger, resentment, and barriers, as well as all other distressing and unpleasant sensations, have all been found to be reduced by EFT in research. It is so easy to do that you can use it on others as well as yourself.
Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT Tapping) is a mind-body technique for increasing energy and well-being by recognising and resolving the root cause of uncomfortable feelings.
The common meridian points used in EFT are:
- Karate chop point on the hand
- Eyebrow
- Temple
- Under the nose
- Chin
- Collarbone
- Under the arm
Whether done alone or together with an experienced practitioner, EFT ought to bring surprising yet lasting–relief. Simply download the EFT Tapping Booklet below if you want to help others or make a difference in the lives of those around you while also experiencing the power of EFT Tapping first hand.
HOW TO SURRENDER FEELINGS OF RESENTMENT WITH EFT TAPPING
Emotional Freedom Therapy (EFT) is a technique that helps people overcome physical, emotional, and mental problems. It also improves the efficiency of your body's energy flow. It has been demonstrated to be both effective and long-lasting. Moreover, implementation takes only a little time.
To begin the tapping process, follow these steps:
Step 1
Temperature check
Take a brief temperature check on yourself to see how you are feeling. To find out where your emotions and feelings are, ask yourself the following questions:
To find out where your emotions and feelings are, ask yourself the following questions:
- In what circumstances have you felt resentful?
- Have you ever resented giving or receiving something?
- To whom do you feel resentment?
- What opportunities would arise in your life if you never felt resentful again?
- If there was a deeper emotion than resentment, what would it be?
- To avoid feeling resentful, what did you need to say NO to?
Make a list of three times when you have felt resentful. Be honest to yourself and fill out the list. Then, choose the first of the three instances you want to work on.
Step 2
Exploring emotions and sensations
When you pick one of the examples, make a note of:
- What or who makes you feel resentful?
- How does it make you feel?
- On a scale of 1 to 10, what number is it at?
- Where in the body do you feel it?
Step 3
Start tapping on the side of your hand (Karate chop)
Once you have identified one example that you want to explore, now start tapping on the side of the hand (Karate Chop point) while saying your statement out loud:
“Even though I feel resentful about ________ (what are you resentful about) and I can feel it in my ___________________ (body part) ____________ and it is at a number _____________ (add number) and it makes me feel _______________feelings and sensations), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Repeat this procedure 3 times.
Step 4
Tap on the face and upper body EFT Tapping points while saying
Say out loud the reminder phrases that includes information on the story name, number and feeling:
- Eyebrow: I feel resentful about __________ (what you are resentful about)
- Side of Eye/ Temple: I can feel it in my_____________ (body part)
- Under the Eye: It is at a number __________________ (number)
- Under the Nose: It makes me feel ______________ (feeling or sensation)
- Chin: In my ____________ (body part) at a number _______________
- Collarbone: Really ___________________ (feeling or sensation)
- Underarm: So ___________________ (feeling or sensation)
- Thumb: So _______________ (feeling or sensation)
- Index finger: Resentful because ____________________
- Middle finger: I feel it in my __________________ (body part)
- Little finger: So ___________________ (feeling or sensation)
Step 5
Close the sequence
Close the sequence by tapping on the side of the hand (Karate Chop point) while saying your statement out loud:
“Even though I feel resentful about ________ (what you are resentful about) and I can feel it in my _______ (body part) ____ and it is at a number _____ (add number) and it makes me feel _____ (feelings and sensations), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Step 6
Breathe and relax
Take a gentle breath in and out, and have a sip of water.
Step 7
Question yourself
Then ask yourself, “What number is the resentment at?” If reduced to a level you feel happy with, you can stop. If you would like it to come down move to step 7.
Then ask yourself these questions:
- What is left about the resentment? (Felt resentful because…)
- Where in the body do you feel it?
- On a scale of 1 to 10, what number is it at?
- How does it make you feel?
Step 8
Repeat steps 2-6 till the charge on what made you feel resentful comes down.
Step 9
Once this example is complete, go back and explore the remaining two examples.
It is difficult to deal with resentment on your own, but you can learn to let go of all the things that are dragging you down with a little advice and assistance.
It is important to remember that forgiving and letting go does not mean you have to keep associating with the person who has harmed you or made you resent them.
Whether or not the individual remains in your life, forgiving and letting go of any grudges can provide you with the tranquilly you need to move forward with your own life in a positive manner.
Emotional Freedom Techniques can help you in living your life as you wish, free of unwanted feelings and emotions.
We are here for your help, you determine what you want to work on, and we'll work together to get you there in the most efficient and effective way possible.
Free yourself from resentments, and you will be able to do better in the world.
Happy Tapping!
Continue to learn and explore!
Love,
Dr Rangana Rupavi Choudhuri (PhD)
P.S. Want to discover if EFT Tapping is right for you? Book a Complimentary Discovery Call.
How To Self-Heal & Become An EFT Practitioner
Discover how EFT Tapping can help you to self-heal or to become professionally qualified as a Certified EFT Practitioner. Emotional Freedom Techniques (Tapping) is clinically proven to lower stress, tension, anxiety, past trauma to enable health, happiness and vitality.
In summary, during most stages of our lives, you can experience resentment. It is completely unacceptable to be denied equal opportunity and to be treated unfairly, but you can work around it. When it comes to exploring your sentiments of resentment, EFT tapping is a great place to start. It will get to the source of the problem and provide you with a sense of serenity.
References:
Disclaimer: The information on this website is purely for educational purposes and does not in any way replace the requirement for medical and psychological diagnosis and treatment. Please do seek professional medical and psychological diagnosis and advice for all medical and mental health conditions. It is advised to always book any consultations with qualified professionals.
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