How To End Frustration With EFT Tapping?

EFT Tapping For Frustration

When things don’t happen as per our expectations, our natural response is to get frustrated. Everyone feels frustrated at some point or the other.

This blog explores what is frustration, signs and causes of frustration, and how to use EFT Tapping for Frustration.

Have you experienced moments where you feel so done that you just want to shout out loud?

Does it make you want to quit everything?

I am sure all of us have. From the small irritations of losing something to the bigger problem of continued failure towards a desired goal, we all must have gone through frustrating situations in life.

Sometimes you may have had a bad day, and you felt so frustrated, that you just wanted to take your glasses off and throw them on the table!

Or perhaps, you're in the loo and you're pushing and pushing, and no matter how hard you try, nothing seems to be coming out, and it feels so frustrating!

Other times, you may be frustrated because you wanted to win at something, like a game or a dance competition, and you lost just because of one point!

The most frustrating situations I can recall myself in is when my phone, laptop or internet faces issues. Aaahh! I feel like clenching my teeth tight!

So, there are various situations that may make us feel frustrated. Frustration can be triggered by trivial as well as serious issues in our day to day life.

WHAT IS FRUSTRATION?

Frustration is an emotion that is experienced as a result of not being able to get the desired results. It is usually experienced when we can’t get what we want or can’t achieve something after trying multiple times.

On the other hand, frustration can also be triggered by something silly or unimportant, that is annoying for us.

Although it is common for everyone to feel frustrated, some people may experience frustration to a greater extent in terms of duration and causes.

When frustration results in other negative emotions like anger, stress, resentment, or a spiral downward where we have a feeling of resignation or giving up, it can be harmful.

Here are a few signs of frustration:

Irritability
Losing temper over little things
Anger
Hopelessness/Giving up
Substance abuse
Restlessness
Exhaustion
Stress
Difficulty sleeping
Feeling worried or anxious

WHAT CAUSES FRUSTRATION?

Frustration is commonly experienced by everyone in their life. Sometimes people experience frustration in the short-term — for example a child crying loud for long — but for others, frustration can be long-term.

Frustration can be caused either by external factors or by internal factors.

Internal Factors

Frustration caused by internal factors involves a sense of disappointment that is experienced as a result of not getting what you want or not being to accomplish your goals.

This can be due to the limiting beliefs that you may have for yourself. Contrastingly, limiting beliefs can also form because of many unsuccessful attempts at something (1).

Beliefs such as, “I'm so incompetent”, “I can't seem to get it right”, “I'm just not good enough”, “I'm a failure”, “you know I'm not going to be successful”, can get formed as a result of repeatedly failing to get what you want.

Frustration is caused because there is a goal in mind, something that you are wanting to move towards, but it's just not happening. This triggers a person, and they're triggered to feel, those limiting beliefs out of frustration.

External Factors

External sources of frustration include the people, places and things that are annoying or irritating for us.

For example, long queues at immigration, queues to get your food, going to a store or only to find that it’s closed or doesn’t have what you want in stock, getting stuck in traffic, and loud music playing nearby. What's even more frustrating is when someone tries to cut the queue! (1).

There may be many other things that may be going on in your lives that serve as contributing factors to your frustration.

Some of them are (2):

Your state of physical health and any medical conditions. If you are suffering from any illness that interferes with your daily life, it can bring about feelings of frustration and helplessness.
Your financial situation, including debts, or wasteful spending
Your emotional health. If you are going through emotional or mental difficulties or loss, including bereavement, a clinical psychological condition, loss of a dear one, it is natural to feel frustrated.
Stress at work, or losing a job
Being unsuccessful at achieving a goal after many attempts
Trying to solve a problem and not being able to find a solution

However, we tend to use the term “frustrating” for many emotions that we actually feel. Frustration is possibly only the top surface of a feeling.

Beneath that surface, many deeper underlying emotions could be present. Let’s try to figure out exactly what those deeper emotions are (3):

Anger:

With frustration comes a feeling of anger. Anger is often what's going on, on a deeper level when you feel that something is frustrating you.

You want to tear down your non-functioning printer and set it aflame, or throw your frozen mobile phone out of the window.

You want to scream at your sibling for taking your charger because you've told him four times to get him his own, and yet it still isn't happening.

Anxiety:

Many times, "frustration" seems an easier emotion to admit to than fear.

But what is really frustrating you is the fact that you can’t get answers to something that's unknown: You want reassurance or certainty, and yet it's not coming.

You're "frustrated" that your boss isn't getting back to you when she said she would. Or perhaps, you are waiting for call from your doctor after you just got your tests done, and it’s been long.

You're "frustrated" that your partner hasn't checked in after such a long day. This is because the truth is that, your frustration is driven by anxiety.

Sadness:

Sometimes, sadness is experienced from a sense of despair about the seeming hopelessness of a situation.

You want something to change, a situation or person—or maybe you even want to change something about yourself—and yet it's not happening.

This makes you feel "frustrated," as you may have to give up or let go of something that you always thought would happen.

Or it could be that you are utterly disappointed with yourself.

Imagine the "frustration" that comes from not ever being able to meet a goal of waking up early to exercise or not being able to be consistent with any habit.

Guilt:

Guilt typically involves you wanting to make peace with something you haven't yet forgiven yourself for.

You feel frustrated because you want to just be able to move on, and let it go, yet you are frustrated that you can't, and you can't escape your feelings.

For example, you may want to end an argument with your partner or a friend and just "forget about it”.

But they just won’t get over it and makes you feel frustrated with them that they won't just let it go.

Shame:

If you have been having low self-esteem, or feeling like you are "bad," or not good enough, you may be carrying these feelings around and feeling frustrated with yourself.

The burden of prolonged shame can cause a general sense of helplessness and hopelessness, both of which can lead to the feelings of frustration.

If you have been experiencing frustration since a long time, you should probably explore if there are feelings of shame associated with it, as it may be connected to the frustration that comes from a sense of you not being worthy enough to live the life you want.

Being able to better identify your deeper emotions would help in dealing with it from the root cause. So, the next time you feel frustrated, ask yourself, “What has caused me “frustration” lately?” Try to dig deeper and better identify the root of the problem.

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HOW TO DEAL WITH FRUSTRATION?

There are a few simple steps that you can take every day to keep your mind calm and free of all the negative emotions that lead to frustration (4):

Share your thoughts and feelings with someone you trust. Talking out loud can help you get out what you’re feeling, instead of keeping it inside. Not sharing and suppressing your feelings increase the feelings of frustration as everything remains bottled up inside you.
If you can’t or don’t want to talk to someone, start journaling. Writing your feelings and experiences down gives you an outlet of expression and can help you gain some clarity and relieve frustration.
Practice meditation as a tool to practice mindfulness. The root of frustration and all other negative emotions is our inability to stay in the present moment. We either keep on ruminating our past or keep on imagining the future outcomes causing stress, anxiety, worry, guilt, shame and of course, frustration.
Practice breathing exercises or Pranayama to calm down your nervous system and your brain. A relaxed state of mind is free of frustrations and worries.
Add Yoga or any other physical exercise to your routine. Exercise has great emotional and cognitive benefits along with physical ones. When we exercise, neurotransmitters known as endorphins are released by the brain, which make you feel accomplished and improves self esteem. As a result, it lowers your frustration.
Take some time off to spend with yourself and do things that you like. Relaxation activities like watching a movie, taking up a hobby, or going for a vacation can help you feel rejuvenated and fresh, lowering feelings of frustration.
Take the help of mental health professionals in the form of psychological counselling or psychotherapy.
Find new and alternate way to achieve your goals or restructure your plan.
Most importantly, recognize and accept what you can change and what you can’t. Accepting and making peace with the situation can relieve frustrating feelings when you realize you don’t have control over what happened.

HOW DOES EFT TAPPING HELP IN DEALING WITH FRUSTRATION?

EFT or Emotional Freedom Techniques is a unique and one of its kind therapeutic technique that uses talk and touch to heal emotional, mental as well as physical problems.

This technique is relatively new and was invented in the 1990s, but it is based on the ancient knowledge of Chinese medicine (acupuncture) along with modern psychology.

In this technique, a person taps on a few specific points on the body that are based on acupuncture, while saying out certain statements related to the problem that he/she wants to resolve.

This method of tapping on meridian points along with saying specific statements is proven to be clinically effective for stress, anxiety, phobias, weight loss and cravings, PTSD, depression, as well as chronic diseases.

As discussed in the above section, there could be many underlying emotions beneath the surface of frustration.

EFT Tapping for frustration will enable you to uncover deeper emotional aspects associated with the feelings of frustration, and heal them from its root cause.

EFT TAPPING FOR FRUSTRATION

Step 1:

First Use EFT Tapping On What It Feels Like To Feel The Frustration

Explore the physical sensations in the body associated with the frustration and use the physical tension tapping process to reduce the sensations.

To begin the process of EFT Tapping for Frustration, take some time and ask yourself the following questions. Write them down if you want:

What situations make you feel frustrated?
Who makes you feel frustrated?
What has to happen to experience frustration?
What negative beliefs does frustration trigger in you?
If you were to no longer get frustrated, what space would open up in your life for the better?

Now, bring into your awareness, a time when you felt frustrated.

Investigate the physical nature of frustration

To understand the physical nature of frustration, think of the answers to the below questions, and notice where you feel it in the body. Ask yourself the following:

Where in the body do you experience the feeling of frustration?
What is the colour, size, texture, shape of the frustration? (Try to imagine)
What are the sensations like? How does frustration feel? For example, rough or smooth.

Measure the level of frustration by rating it on a scale of 0-10:

Ask yourself:

“What number is the level of frustration at?” where 10 is very high and 0 is very low. Just go with whatever comes up in your mind spontaneously, without thinking much about it.

Start tapping on the side of the hand:

“Even though I feel frustrated about_____________ and I can feel it in my (part of the body)________________________ and it’s at a number _____________ and it makes me feel _______________ I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

Repeat this 3 times.

Start tapping on the upper body, facial and finger tapping points:

Eyebrow: I feel frustrated about _________
Side Of The Eye: I feel it in my ___________
Under The Eye: It’s at a number _______
Under The Nose: It makes me feel _______
Chin: It’s in my ________ at a number _____
Collarbone: This frustration_________
Under the arm: So much frustration ____________
Thumb: It makes me feel ____________
Index Finger: Feeling frustrated because___________
Middle Finger: I feel it in my ______________
Little Finger: So frustrating________________

Close the sequence by tapping on the Karate Chop:

“Even though I feel __________ and I feel it in my ___________ and it’s at a number _______ and it makes me feel _______, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

Relax:

Take a gentle breath in and out and take a sip of water.

Test:

After the round of tapping, ask yourself, “What number is the frustration at?”

If it has reduced to a level you feel happy with, you can stop. Or you can repeat this process if you feel like the number could come down a little more.

Step 2:

Discover past experiences of feeling frustrated and clear them

To reveal the memories linked to feeling it, you can ask questions like:

When have you felt frustrated before?
What does that feeling remind you of?
When is it that you don’t experience frustration?
What can trigger and bring about the feeling of frustration?

Step 3:

Explore any other limiting beliefs that prevents you from feeling confident

Limiting beliefs are conscious or unconscious thoughts that prevent us from growing and achieving our goals. They are usually responsible for self-sabotage, procrastination and low-self esteem, in an individual.

Try to think of the limiting beliefs you may be having. Then shift them negative to positive.

For example:

“I don’t think I can do it” to “I am capable of doing it well.”

Step 4:

Close with positive EFT Tapping for frustration:

Example of a positive tapping statements are:

“Even though I feel so frustrated about this, I choose to remain at peace.”

DOES EFT TAPPING FOR FRUSTRATION ACTUALLY WORK?

EFT has been scientifically proven to heal a wide range of physical as well as emotional and mental issues.

It is effective to deal with all kinds of negative emotions including fear, anger, sadness, hurt, guilt, shame, worry, resentment, stress, anxiety and so on. A lot of these emotions are at the root of the feelings of frustration.

In one of the research studies, there were 52 participants who were 3rd year Foundation Degree level students undertaking a Research Methods Module. The module included an evaluated presentation, which was known to elicit anxiety among students.

The students were given a brief assignment workshop followed by a 15 minute lecture on introduction of EFT. They were then guided though one round of EFT Tapping emphasizing on their anxiety of public speaking.

The student’s level of distress, and level of anxiety were measured pre and post EFT sessions. The students were informed that they could continue to use EFT Tapping at any time to reduce their anxiety regarding their assessed presentation.

Immediately after their presentation, the students were asked to take part in a brief face- to-face interview. This was to identify who used EFT and to explore their use of and feelings about EFT.

It was also to identify those who had chosen not to use EFT and explore their reasons for not choosing to use it. 88% of the total sample participated in the research. A significant reduction was found in the level of distress, and level of anxiety.

The qualitative data were analysed using a framework approach which explored the following three themes: helpfulness of EFT in reducing anxiety and staying calm and focussed; using other complementary therapy skills; and their reasons for not using EFT.

There is a growing research in the area of EFT and there have been multiple studies till date that validate the effectiveness of EFT.

EFT Tapping is a simple and effective to help you dive deeper into the feelings of frustration and calm your mind and body. When the mind and body are calm, it allows you to find solutions.

Try EFT for yourself and make yourself free of frustration!

Continue to learn and explore!

Love,

Dr Rangana Rupavi Choudhuri (PhD)

P.S. Want to discover if EFT is right for you? Book a Complimentary Discovery Call.

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In summary, frustration is experienced whenever the results (goals) you are expecting, do not seem to fit the effort and action you are applying. EFT Tapping for Frustration can be extremely beneficial for overcoming frustration along with any and all kind of associated negative emotions.

References:

Disclaimer: The information on this website is purely for educational purposes and does not in any way replace the requirement for medical and psychological diagnosis and treatment. Please seek professional medical and psychological diagnosis and advice for all medical and mental health conditions. It is advised to always book any consultations with qualified professionals.

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